So today was an interesting day. Started off like any other day; woke up, rolled out of bed, fell asleep on the floor, woke up, took a shower, put on clothes and caught the trolley to class at 10am. For the past few weeks on Wednesdays I left school after that class and went home because there was no reason to go to the next class, Atmospherics II (or weatherman class as I call it). Today was different in that there was an assignment scheduled. I had to make an appearance.
I thought I recalled the teacher saying a few weeks prior that the remaining assignments in the class were forecasts, meaning that I simply have to predict the weather for the next day at noon. These assignments were done in class and were not hard at all. I stroll into class a few minutes late and take a seat. I looked around and noticed that people did NOT have the simple forecast sheets but instead small packets of paper. Looking closer at a friend's packet I realize that there was no forecast today but instead a previously assigned takehome assignment due that day. Damnit.
Now, I was not really worried until I read the assignment sheet that clearly said, "This assignment must be completed to pass the course." My brain instantly goes to work as to how I am going to do this. The assignment consisted of looking at weather data from 6 madeup weather stations over the course of a year. Every month the average temperature and total precipitation was listed as well as the overall yearly average temperature and total precipitation. From the data, the Koeppen Climate Classification had to be determined, justified and the data graphed in a specific way. Luckily for me, the main answer, the classification, was only a three letter code. Most of the work was just the tedious process of graphing and justification. I quickly copied the 6 codes from my friend before he turned his packet in and ran out of the class to make the graphs at a computer lab. My roommate Chuck, also in the class, called to see if he should come to class. I told him the situation and he headed towards the lab to help out.
Working feverishly, I began typing in all the information and started making graphs while Chuck looked up the justifications for the answers I wrote down. When it comes down to it, a lot of work can be done in 45 minutes. At around 12:50, the time class ended, I was stapling the 7 pages of pseudo good work (we bullshitted some). The teacher usually heads from class to his office on the 8th floor of a nearby building before he leaves for the day. My plan was to head to his office and just make some lame excuse that I forgot the assignment at home and had to run there to get it.
Papers in hand, flapping in the wind, I ran to his office but the door was locked. Assuming that he was still packing up in the classroom, I hurried down the 8 stories and into the building where class was held. Upon running to the classroom I see that he is not there either. I deduce that while he was going to his office I was leaving and missed him on the way. So I run out of the class and head down the hall on my way to the office again, hoping to catch him there before he left to go home. While running down the hall outside of the classroom, papers still in hand, I notice a girl laid out in what I thought was a somewhat uncomfortable position on the ground....
Another girl was pacing next to her on a cellphone looking freaked out. As I run close I notice the girl on the ground isn't really moving.
Me (thinking to myself): Hmm, that's odd.... that girl isn't moving.....nope, still not moving....
I stop my full stride but continue moving..I hear the girl on the cellphone talking to campus security in a babbling manner....Ah crap.
Me (walking by pointing to the girl on the ground): Hey..umm, is that girl all right?
Girl on Cellphone: No she is not.
Me: Ah crap.
I look down at my hand to my packet of important papers, then to the girl lying on the ground, then back to the packet of important papers. The theme song to Curb Your Enthusiasm starts playing in my head and I think, "what would Larry David do"?
"Ah crap", I think to myself as I stop and go to the girl on the ground. Next to her outstretched hand there is a bottle of pills. "Ah crap", I think to myself again as I notice she is breathing a little awkwardly. Looking more closely at the bottle of pills I see they are for some sort of pain killer. I move her onto her side to make sure she doesn't choke or anything. Besides that I had no idea what to do so I go to another classroom right nearby and tell the teacher in there someone is unconscious out in the hall. The teacher looks out and recognizes the girl. He says something about how she just had surgery. I have my cellphone out right about to call 911 when the teacher gets out his cellphone and dials.
So I'm standing there, still holding my papers, caught in somewhat of a moral dilemma. All the while the Curb Your Enthusiasm song still playing in my head. I really want to turn in my assignment and I start smiling to myself because of the ridiculousness of the situation. Everyone there looks at me with a weird awkwardness as I force the smile from my face. Campus security shows up and I slowly back away from the group, taking that as my queue to leave. I figure there is nothing else I can do so I run off back to my original mission of turning in the assignment.
Eventually I end up back at the teacher's office and he was there. Out of breathe I babble about running back and forth and dead girls. He simply grabs the assignment, says "thanks!", and turns around in his chair.
I walk out and head towards the trolley again where I run into a large group of septa workers who gave me a bunch of free ramen noodle soup packets.
The end.
Good thing I didn't have to call 911 because I would have definitely had to stay there. I do hope that girl is all right.
